it's nine o'clock on a saturday

it is quiet here.

i'm not sure whether i love it or hate it.

things i have:

people.
scenery.
good, good music.
good, good reads.
running.
myself.


things that are missing:

people.
a paycheck.
oh, & ithaca.

since i've been home, i've been having possibly the strangest dreams i've ever had. first, i dreamed i was the drummer of Tegan and Sara, except I didn't know how to play the drums and was thus terribly stressed out before a show. to ease my stress, they told me, "don't worry, anybody can play the drums, you'll figure it out once you get up there!" then, i was up there, except there was no drum set, & so i found myself banging on the stage with a set of drumsticks.
my next dream involved being at moonshadows, and it was realistic and not out of the ordinary.
i also dreamed about being chased by a t-rex (i am not even kidding) around the ithaca college campus, finding a white tent that i decided to dive headfirst into, only to be confronted with a layer of plastic that would not allow me to actually enter the tent. thus, i somehow clawed my way through the plastic and fell headfirst onto the grassy floor of the tent.

i apologize if this becomes a dream journal.

then i stopped dreaming & have since managed to find myself awake at 3 a.m. in an attempt to fall asleep like a normal person, i read my book (dreaming in cuban - i don't yet have an opinion on it). i wake up in the morning with my cell phone buried in my bed & the book on my face.

i've been running quite a lot, which means that if life keeps pluggin' along this way, i'll be doing a half marathon in the fall and a whole one in the spring. that's quite okay with me. when i moved back home, i found a scrapbook i'd made my senior year of high school for a class. in it, i'd made a list of my "life goals" and was pleased to find i'd accomplished many of them.
1. parasail...check.
2. study abroad...check.
3. write poetry...check. quite the check.
4. live in a city...check.
5. run a marathon...a doable possibility.

in other news, i've developed an intense obsession with This American Life. do yourself a favor and listen to it.


the other day, somebody asked me, "what is your dream job?"

i don't know what my dream job is, but i know it involved books, writing, teaching, and music.